My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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