I have demons in me.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize
