i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
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