Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
