My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
