guys are not supposed to queef...right?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
