Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
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