In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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