There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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