im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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