I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
