Midget sex pt 2 tonight
420 ftw
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
