i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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