do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize