got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
