Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
only you would photoshop your dick
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
