Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
