Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Randomize
