the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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