just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
There r osticjed everywhere
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
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