who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
