My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
