yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize