Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
