You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
