What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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