I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
