Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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