So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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