Nicole vs. Life
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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