so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
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