You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
