i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
