so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
