do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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