What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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