i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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