haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize