Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
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