@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Couch. On fire.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
