so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
