just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Say something about gay babies.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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