Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
