doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
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