I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
