He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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