I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
That's when you crack a 10am beer
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
