Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
