Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
