You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
