Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Help. Why am I so naked?
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